delivering value to the world..

there is a niche for all,
an offering for everything.
consolidation for the organization of your efforts
a support system for every thought,
every instance,
every expectation,
every facet,
every notion,
every aspect of conscious living,
entrepreneurship to loving,
conscious coaches for each step of evolution,
a therapeutic solution to every emotion,
transient religions
....to monetize your processes of existence?
(when) ....does it become a shortcut to true discovery & learning?

& to those whom provide a valuable service
where does the balance exist ...between art & conformity to marketable design?
does delivering your value to the world, in all of its splendor, become compromised by selling?
by generating income on the evolution of others,
'pon exhibitionism of beauty,
by creating a packaged, buyable version of artful insight, or of unique n' genuine creation
do we sell out?
or are we delivering authentic value in the name of the greater good?

why question if your intention is in integrity
for, .... is beautiful to co-create better realities.

unleashingoldbaggage.

hard to define the immeasurable majesty of descending through subtle worlds from 30,000ft.
remarkable realms of clouds that seeming assuredly contain yet the gods of ages past, wandering, dispersed...
( much is a blur the hours leading up to the moment when i plunged for the first time into the carribean sea... mouth full of salt, heart near to exploding with joy....)
...the vibe in cancun was that of urban sprawl personified...a concrete jungle of all inclusive resorts...the biggest starbucks i have ever seen... corporate domination is indescriminate...
backroads of poverty and a cultural difference that makes a weeblonde canadian girl remarkably evermore grateful for the lifestyle by which i was raised.
shoeless children kicking cans in the dirt...leglesswomen with cups seeking change..
never gets any easier for me to endure the reality of human suffering...empath's plight.
.. i am learning how to build blocks without putting up walls.. but compassion is key to evolution.. so i yet struggle for the balance.
i dozed in and out of jetlagged consciousness as i was driven to the soundtrack of bad 80's music...barry manilow etc... the 90 minutes it took us to get back to tulum... mayan riviera is akin to bali in the 70's so i am told.
down a 5mile road with no lights..
arrived at the mayan retreat that is to be my home for the next 15days.
crashed to the roar of ocean
cut to this morning
light rain...
the parrots here are very effusive in speech..
the vibe is lax. and eclectic mix of people makes it feel very homelike to me, cultural diversity is underrated.
&the magical mystery tour a-la-helengoldstein begins...
50peso cab ride into tulum finds us wandering the dirt sidestreets to find a shaman who helen's scheduled to be @ for 10am.

she performed a powerful ceremony....in front of an altar... 3 eggs... singingbowl...and very strong intent.
feasibly to determine energetic imbalances..blockages...etc...
the smoke from the resin incense ....filled the room loaning transcendental nuances to the 15minute ritual.
spoken entirely in spanish yet little is lost in translation concerning the power of prayer..
for confidentiality's sake details will be limited.. 
cracked eggs in glasses of water reveal whats to be worked on..
she prescribed a hawaiian mantra used to cut old ties, patterns of behaviour, residual energy from past relationships....

im thinking of it as a prayer to release baggage

visualize what it is, who it is, where it is that needs cleansing, renewal, release
a pair of scissors in your left hand and a torch in the other...
...see yourself cutting the ties with the left, applying fire with the right.

Ho'oponopono mantra 

"I am sorry
forgive me
I love you 
and I thank you"

im sorry. forgive me. i love you. and thank you. im sorry forgive me. i love you. and thank you. once a day, for 45 days. minimum.

the view from where i sit is lush,rustic,i feel like ive been here for years. mexican time is like comparing human to dog years... everything takes 8 times longer than what's typical.. although as i am discovering the nicest cultural difference thus far... that many peeps would appreciate..
is that business meetings seem to  be an average of 15 min long.
who wouldnt dig that.

..5 am tangent takers take notes /mantras for a new renaissance : rebirth edition

... upon the realization (after 11 or so failed gmail address recollections ) i couldnt fathom how to access my original blog.. ( given that its been abandoned since march i see it as the universe coersing me towards yet another sense of newness )
need for rebirth becomes most prevalent in the weest of hours.. several levels of progressive alpha wave bliss followed by the deepest delta influx could not quiet my mind tonight.
(...  ought be noted i also made valiant effort at faithfully counting my mala beads and practicing several rounds of mindful breathing... )...all irrelevant...
as it simply brought me where i needed to be..
arent we always right where we are supposed to be?
a proposed question that lends many nowist and idealistically minded do-gooders to often reach into the trenches of the subconsciousmind in hopes of grasping some manner of engrained answer from the harvest of thought..
i have no such revelation.

tonight i breathed ... really breathed for the first time in what felt like a year..although my concept of time is questionable at best..what compels us to strive to perpetuate situations that are unhealthy for us?... what drives us to the often unrecognized perception of unworthiness that ultimately unfolds as poor judgment and potentially regressive decisions?
this can be argued two ways.. the first is that we are ever evolving, ever learning, ever drawing closer ( if we are conscious ) to the ultimate enlightenment... truly knowing ourselves, accepting ourselves with unconditional love and a clear minded understanding of what motivates us, what empowers us, how the true meaning of compassion manifests in our actions- and during that process we must undergo many series' of tests, which i suspect, are search party sent out by the soul.
recognizing our mirrors, engaging our duals, and drawing constant retrospect is what lends the will to survive the often intense rounds of retribution we often end up making once hindsight has lent her vision.
the purpose of mindfulness is to never have to consider the existence of hindsight.
i am learning the importance of integrating nowism with responsible and reliable sense of foresight, that can only come from selfawareness and consistent effort.
... the purpose of this first mildly digressive missive was simply to articulate that selfknowledge is curative to poor patterns of behaviour that deviate previously good intentions... to be seduced by the flagrant and indulgent tendencies of ego.
if we are blinded by ourselves than we can never truly see ourselves. even when presented with catalyst-ic gifts of kindred and counter partners.

the second way this could be semantically discoursed is that when we reach a place within ourselves within the universe, wherein we comprehend the aforementioned principles of insightful observation - we may be coming from a place of truth, of authenticity and of compassion, a place that drives us to want to give, selflessly, to put as much goodness out as possible in effort to try and balance the measure of beauty that exists in each and every moment, to give back to that beauty, to pay tribute to the goodness in all by drawing out the goodness in others. living only on the goodness...to a fault.
i have been in this place many times ( ...the universe will keep delivering the same shit to your doorstep, over and over in a different package until you learn how to receive the lesson being delivered within that box of shit ) ... this place where i am learning to come back to myself.
over and over, we must learn to return to ourselves, and its through the lesson of giving too much that i am here in this insomniacmoment...learning to receive...learning to listen to a ruthlesslyrestlessmindintheweedawnminutes... and thefrequencyiamtuningintotellsmethat
regardless of how much we want to see the good in others, we are sometimes simply trying to reflect the good in ourselves. this is inappropriate. its acceptable, and i will continue to love sans-attrition, but it is not the way to wellness... it is not the way to freedom..
we look to others to believe. when we have no faith.
we strive to be seen because we feel invisible.
why are we afraid to be happy?
those are the notions that weave an intricately tailored system of suffering.
do not regress for fear of change. it simply leads you back to the same instance.
love for freedom. and not for security.
doubt not the capacity to be your own salvation.
while you witness yourself... chaos is tempered.

...premise seems so simple - yet lifetimes pass by with masses blind
if inherent truth is an edible concept, breeding arrogance + humility.. the offspring is androgynous.
..balance.

i want for nothing..i am alive in this moment, all moments prior to this are revelatory triumph on a canvas of empty sky.
package received. pattern broken.
i have seen myself. and i still am.
we are all worthy.
...and so i guess there was a revelation.